Sex Therapy
SEX THERAPY, Sex Counseling, & Coaching
Sex therapy with is evidence-based and aims to help you create the sex life that you find most fulfilling, not based on religious propaganda or pseudo-science.
Michael DeMarco, PhD
"Believing that you are addicted to porn and telling yourself that you're unable to control your porn use hurts your well-being. It's not the porn, but the unresolved, unexamined moral conflict. Many of the moral values we were raised with, about sex, race or gender, are no longer fully applicable to the modern world. Because of religious opposition to sexual education, many people struggling with masturbation don’t understand what is normal, or that their sexual interests are healthy. Helping people to consciously examine and consider their religious beliefs about sex, masturbation, and porn with modern, adult, self-determining eyes, may help them reduce the pain and suffering caused by this moral conflict."
According to Abraham Maslow, sex is one of the most very basic of human drives (even more basic than love). Therapists specializing in sex therapy use this as a guiding principal.
Abraham Maslow suggested in his Hierarchy of Needs that humans are all striving towards the top of the pyramid, which is self-actualization– an ongoing process of making sure the other blocks of your pyramid are sturdy. Sex, a basic human need, is sometimes confused with love and sexual intimacy, which are higher-order needs. Are you fully self-actualized? Not many of us are- which means most of us can benefit from therapy.
Do your sexual parts not work the way you think they should? Do you your sexual parts not look the way you think they should? You might have a sexual dysfunction. Feel like your sex life is out of control? Put down the "sex addiction" self-help book, and talk to a sex therapist who can help you sort through the noise.
Sex has finally come out of the closet. People talk more openly about sexuality now than we have in decades. There are people who claim to be sex experts who want to cure your sex addiction, porn addiction, or masturbation addiction through prayer and magical thinking. Weaponizing your pre-existing fear, guilt and shame surrounding sex drives clicks and makes money. Although there is no license for sex therapy, look for ABS Certified Clinical Sexologists or AASECT Certified Sex Therapists.
Sex therapy is talk therapy.
Conversion therapy is not therapy at all.
Therapy does not involve sex with your therapist.
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Why do you go to a sex therapist?
Issues ranging from working out guilt surrounding masturbation, sexual fantasies, porn, fetishes, dating, sexual identity, gender identity, relationship style, infidelity issues (and often the desire to be consensually non-monogamous) to sexual dysfunctions like premature ejaculation, delayed ejaculation, painful sex, difficulties become aroused, difficulties achieving or maintaining erections, difficulties with vaginal lubrication, difficulties reaching climax.
Who Goes to Sex Therapy?
Sex therapy is as fitting for singles or people in relationships across the lifespan. Sex is a basic human drive, yet sexuality conflicts affect people from birth to death.
What Happens in Sex Therapy?
- Permission
- Broadening your Limited Information about sex
- Specific Suggestions & Exercises to try at home
- Intensive Therapy
This model is called the PLISSIT Model of Sex Therapy.
BUT WHAT IS A SEX THERAPIST?
Here's a great explanation from AASECT, the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists:
AASECT requires sexuality counselors and sex therapists to fulfill specific and rigorous training requirements in order to become certified and use the title of sex therapist. AASECT Certified Sex Therapists are mental health professionals, trained to provide in-depth psychotherapy, who have specialized in treating clients with sexual issues and concerns. They are either licensed, or in the absence of required licensure, they are certified, registered, or clinical members of a national psychotherapy organization.
Sex therapists work with sexual concerns and, in addition, where appropriate, are prepared to provide comprehensive and intensive psychotherapy over an extended period of time in more complex cases.
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Loyal | thisisloyal.com
Trans people exist, and always have. Educate your Self.
Personal and perceived partner orgasm pursuit: A daily diary study about the gendered orgasm gap (Wolfer, et al, 2025)
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/02654075251316579
Brittany Wong
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Sex Therapist California Sex Therapist New York Sex Therapist Vermont Sex Therapist Utah
Michael DeMarco, PhD
Luis Prada
Right now, as you read this, in the year 2025, the website for Oklahoma’s State Department of Health states that “AIDS prevention education shall specifically teach students” that homosexuality is “primarily responsible” for exposure to AIDS. It sounds like it was written in 1985 and has never been updated. Note- homosexuality does not cause AIDS.
Sammi Caramela
"We can access or even live out these fantasy tropes without the real risk of danger. Also known as “symbolic enactment,” the escapism becomes a ritual of sorts that allows us to act out our fantasies without the associated risks."
Archer Magazine
"No one is going to question that you’re doing something completely different from yourself, so it very quickly becomes a safe space for those questioning their gender identity and sexuality."
Kyle Mustain
